The infant's sleep problems, i.e. how to survive and not go crazy

The infant's sleep problems, i.e. how to survive and not go crazy

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You can read a lot of books. Spend hours on the online forum, consider yourself extremely calm, consistent and patient, and you will often be tired during the first year of your child's lack of sleep. Accept it instead of fighting, because ... it's not up to you. At least not in the first months of life, when the child dictates the conditions.

He doesn't sleep at night anymore!

You may have a perfect baby, but you will most likely give birth to a normal baby who will introduce new rules into your life. You will soon find out that seeing a baby sleeping peacefully at night for several hours is just a sweet picture, unreal and having little to do with the reality of the first months.

Most likely, your child will not want to sleep when you think it should. And worse, you can't do much in such situations. You are not able to change the reality in such a way that the toddler does not wake up dozens of times or fancies night fun. A child, especially an infant, cannot be programmed (at least not immediately). This does not mean, however, that you are quite helpless ... You can do a lot to survive a difficult time and not worsen the stressful situation. In this article, we present some, we hope, valuable tips: how to make up for lost time and sleep.

Flexibility - parental virtue

Unfortunately, parents of young children usually don't have much choice. Instead of fighting the nature of the child in the first weeks and months, it is worth to comply with it in a sense.

If a toddler wakes up at night and is a newborn, it will not always be effective to feed him or change his diaper. Sometimes a small child wakes up for other reasons. It happens, although to young parents it often seems ridiculous that at three in the morning the toddler is just a good night's sleep ... In this situation, of course, not much can be done, except to keep calm and sit next to the child in silence or humming a lullaby to toddler or finally he fell asleep, or though he didn't scream how much strength in his lungs.

If the child is still awake despite the passing moments, try to relax with him. Sit in an armchair, pick up a book, hug your baby or turn on calm music and calm down. Proceed as you would have trouble falling asleep after a hard day.

Why is it worth It is often the case that the more we want to finally sink into the embrace of Morpheus, the more difficult we get the desired condition. Therefore, instead of putting your baby to sleep by force, it is better to do everything so that this forced night vigil does not frustrate too much and just wait. The best advice is to try to relax and when your toddler finally falls asleep, relax. If we put too much energy into sleep, we will finally feel frustrated (this is normal) and when the toddler finally falls asleep, we will not be able to squint.

No games

It may come to our mind to play with a child in the middle of the night. Such a thought often appears immediately with the justification that in this way the child will get tired and fall asleep faster. However, this is not worth doing. This is not the best way, even for a small child. You can easily get the opposite effect to the intended one. In addition, we should do everything to show the child the difference between day and night from day one. It will pay off in the future.

Don't react too quickly

Although many articles and portals try to convince you to a different style of behavior, it is not worth reacting too quickly. Not every sigh, grunt or snoring requires our immediate intervention. We do not have to respond to every sound coming from the crib, although it is very difficult in the first weeks of the child's life ...

If the child wakes up in the middle of the night and does not cry, it makes no sense to approach his bed. Even babbling should not motivate parents to move unnecessarily. The toddler can make a variety of sounds, moan, even humming or shouting joyfully. It's his right. It is our right to rest at this time.

Let the method cry

Formerly often practiced. Today, however, strongly condemned. And rightly so. When a child cries, he has a reason. The parent's role is to eliminate the cause of crying and calm the child. If, despite having done everything possible, the baby often cries "for no reason", it is worth consulting a doctor. Instead of stressing, it's better to be safe than sorry.

A method like "let it cry out" can only be helpful in one case. When the parent is on the verge of exhaustion and has the impression that if the child does not calm down immediately, he will not control himself. In such a situation, if no one else can take care of the baby at the moment, it is best to put the child in the cot for a few to several minutes to control yourself. There is nothing to blame! Everyone is only human. Parent also.

Organize yourself help

Ripped pads for babies are the norm. Of course, it's easy to write that to avoid their consequences, sleep well when the child - for example, during the day. However, this is not always possible. There can be plenty of reasons - starting with having a second child or children, work responsibilities - at home or away, a long list of housework, etc. In addition, naps during the day are not able to compensate for sleep at night and it is worth it.

What can you do? First of all, take advantage of the help offered by loved ones. Of course, basic support should come from the child's father. However, this is not about influencing the other side, suggesting or worse, taking care of the baby. The man should feel the need to help himself, because the child is just like his and mother. Unfortunately, it happens that this is not the case and that the theory is far from practice. Therefore, if for what reason a partner cannot relieve a woman of night care for a child, it is worth seeking help elsewhere. It always exists institution of "grandparents"and when it also fails - you can support siblings or friends. If you cannot count on your loved ones, it is worth using the help offered by companies specializing in supporting women after childbirth (details can be found, for example, here: or simply hire a babysitter or domestic help. The way may be to use help from my mother's friendwho has a child of a similar age. In this way you can support each other and gain many valuable hours of rest.

What should such a duty look like for a child? It's best if your grandmother, friend or relatives look after the child outside the home, so that my mother could sleep peacefully at that time. Staying with your child at home, especially in the apartment, is often not good enough to fall asleep. Therefore, it is best to send a toddler with his grandmother or sister for a longer walk ...

Read how to silence a tired baby.

Don't blame yourself

It is not the parents' fault that the child sleeps badly. You are not a bad mother. The worst you can do is blame yourself and blame it. Your child is very normal: he cries, sleeps in short periods, eats at night. The toddler can wake up several times at night and have long breaks in sleep, he can also wake up only a few times and fall asleep immediately. In both cases it is the norm.

It is also quite natural that that you can envy mothers whose children sleep at night. It is normal that you would like it too. However, this is not a reason to blame yourself or to feel that you are not doing something, doing something wrong or being a bad mother! There is no need to look for a scapegoat in the immediate vicinity. It is typical of human nature that you want to find him, explaining the behavior of an infant who does not sleep with a loud conversation of the husband before bed, blame the TV not turned off, or too dynamic play with the child before bed. The truth is only one and rather insightful - an infant is a small child who can cry at night, feel like playing and sleep in half-hourly episodes. He has the right to do so. On the other hand, parents have the right to be tired, sometimes also frustrated.

It is comforting that sooner or later the longed-for day will finally come when the child will sleep fully all night. Most likely it will be a date that you will remember for a long time.